Dream Man #1 by Kristen Ashley
How this book
scored above four on http://www.goodreads.com is beyond me. Maybe we didn’t read the same book because there is no way in hell the stuff I read is even a two.
I saw Motorcycle man in the nominees for 2012 so I decided I’d give the series a chance. Boy, do I wish I had just skipped the damned page. Talk about waste of space and time!
First of all, the story starts straight away without any descriptions, without any explanations. In fact, I had no idea what the main character Gwen looked like until the epilogue. The whole book is more speech and dialogues than anything else. Except, of course, when there is a hot guy that just must be described!
Now that I mentioned hot guys, this is another problem I had with this book. It starts out with her realising she’s a slut (which she is as her actions later confirm in the book) because she sleeps with a man she doesn’t know who sneaks into her house whenever he wishes. Okay, let’s talk about that for a second. How many of us women are there who would not be disturbed by the fact that some mysterious guy has access to your home, to you and you have no idea how he does it? If it were me, I would be worried that if he could do it then anyone could do it. New locks and a security system would be my next logical step. If he’s so horny he can always ring the damned bell like a normal person. And let’s not forget that on top of everything else they were having unprotected sex. Nevermind STDs and unwanted pregnancy – all is well as long as Gwennie is getting some from the creeper.
After some sh*t happened with her dear sis (a complete piece of trash who still is more likeable at the end than our dear Gwen) she decided to go lay her problems at a biker gang’s feet. Best decision ever. And (what a surprise!) Hot Guy #2 comes in the picture. Tack is a badass all around, hot, dangerous yadda yadda but the moment he lays eyes on Gwennie he falls for her. So this big bear of a man talked to our main character ONCE and he gave her his protection (a big deal in biker gangs’ world) and agreed to basically risk his life and the lives of the gang members for her. Cuz she’s cute and talks about Barbies. Uh-uh. And he terrifies her but she still thinks he’s super-duper hot and gets the shivers when he touches her. Oh the romance. Then her house gets broken into and behold! Hot Guy #3 makes an entrance. Every normal woman would be shocked that a man tried to get in her bedroom but what does Gwennie do? She flirts! And just like that Mitch Lawson becomes her next victim (with only 4 lines exchanged between them). That all happens for one day, and what a busy day it was for Gwennie ensnaring hearts left and right. Why, you might ask, is every man in the book falling for her charms? Because she has tits and ass and she is a smartass. Uh-uh.
By the way, there is a difference between being a smartass and being stupid. As a proud smartass myself, I should know the difference.
From then on it’s the story of a woman who can’t make up her mind about who she likes better. She is with Hot Guy #1 but she flirts with everyone else, she kisses Hot Guy #2 and sleeps with him spooning, she even lives with him shortly. She also allows Hot Guy #3 to touch her and get in a kissing distance the night she was supposed to go out on her first date with her beloved. And, let’s not forget the best friend who has been in love with her for years.
But anyway, moving on. Before I forget I just have to mention the horrible horrible taste of the author in names. Cabe aka Hot Guy #1 to me personally sounds like a cape, like Superman’s cape. Or cabbage. Tack? Sounds good but still weird. Gwendolyn I have personally never liked – to me it’s not the name of a strong woman but of a whiny pretty one. And then there’s Ginger Kidd. Seriously? Ginger Kid??? Let alone Jury, Bruno, Asher, Gus, Hawk etc.
So, after everyone risks their lives for her because they all want to get in her panties, after she starts a war between the gang and Cabe’s base for the same reason, she finally decides she wants Cabe. After a fair amount of drama, of course. What seriously annoyed me about their relationship is how much he was spoiling her. I get that the man wants to make gestures and sh*t but buying her shoes for 12 000 dollars? Bit over the top hmm?
And what is up with calling everyone, and I mean everyone, baby? Am I the only one who still thinks endorsements like that should be used only in a relationship, not when you talk to your best friend’s fiancée?
Then, they finally get together-together, everything is swell but the book still keeps going. By that point I was getting sick and tired of reading about their life as a lovey-dovey couple who are just so damn adorable together. So what was the point of those 20-30 pages? Well, there had to be a big bang for the finish. Whoaaa Cabe got kidnapped and Gwennie had to save him. Which is about the point where she becomes a total disappointment after briefly deciding to trade her sister for him. I mean, why act logically and do the obvious and call his base? Instead, she cries, she drags everyone into her sh*t without thinking about the consequences for them and she wants to take her sister, her own blood, and give her over.
Finally, everything falls into place and they lived happily ever after. *Sigh*
Oh, let’s not forget Cabe and his annoying habit of ordering her around. Everything that came out of that man’s mouth was an order. Everything. And every single time I read his line and she complied it made my teeth itch. Gwennie didn’t really make a decision regarding their relationship (or anything else) throughout the whole book – when she tried to he simply ignored her.
All in all, my opinion of the book can be summarised by this:
Reviewed by Krissy
Dirty Little Books 